In my own little corner..

When I lived at home with my parents I pretty much lived in my room. I had a computer, a tv and a snack stash.. what more did I need?

My husband is deployed. Officially. Not detatched, not on training, not working late.. he is deployed. And I have prepared my bedroom for hours of living without having to leave. I keep expecting my father to walk by my door and go, “Are you depressed? Why do you never leave your room?”

The truth, I am not depressed. I am doing really well actually. Granted I’ve done this part before. A friend of mine who’s man is also on a carrier said to me, “You will do fine when he leaves. Its the day you realize its been past six weeks and he isn’t coming home for four more months that will be a problem.” And she is exactly right. All those little detatchments that I thought were so good to help us get ready are now turning six months into six years. So I have made a list of some things that take longer than six months.

-Pregnancey : no no, not pregnant here.. just sayin.. it takes a while!

-Highschool : that actually took four years and I never thought I’d make it.

-Marraige : Okay I love my husband but there have been moments that I swore one of us was about to die.

-Nursing assistant internship : lasted a year, every day. I realize there are people with a passion that is the elderly or incapable. But my passion is not the bodily secretions of those to whom I am not related.

-Perms: Never had a perm but I’ve been there for some right out of a Stephen King novel.

-Every bad relationship I’ve ever had : I dated the same jerk for two and a half years, previous relationship having lasted almost two. However, my husband and I dated for three months. Go figure.

So these are just a few, and if you have some I would love to hear them! The thing that makes this deployment so hard is how much I enjoy my life with my husband. Every moment of my life, even the mundane ones, is enriched by his company. I miss him so much, and it will be difficult living the next six months thinking about how much fun our life is together, and how much I love doing anything and everything with him. I can’t wait until my husband is home!

Back to our regularly scheduled program.

No radio show pun intended. We are back, I am back.. life is back to normal. Yesterday he got a haircut and shaved off his leave beard. My vacation husband is gone, and my obviousley military husband is here again. My slightly overstressed, uniform wearing, order following, SAT concious husband with a ten pm bedtime. It really is a different man from my crazy hairy, pj wearing husband that stays up late, sleeps in and eats junk food all day long. This morning I was up at 0530, donned my early morning garb (you know those sweatpants and slipper socks that say “I am my mother”) and drove him to work. “How did we get here?” I thought as I drove away from the hanger. But.. we had nine months plus! Where did they all go? Cruise is supposed to be over nine months away and now.. its waving to me from across the supermarket, like that person you haven’t seen since highschool and it would be too soon if you never did. And you think, if I ever see that person I hope I am in my best outfit and having a great hair and make-up day.. well I feel totally unprepared. I am caught in the supermarket with no make-up, bed-hair and slipper socks, in a hoodie that says “Hug a Navy wife or give her liqour.” Yes this is the state of being I am in. And I wonder how long I will stay here until I move on from suprised and in shock to histerical and irrational.

Its not that I think I won’t make it. I mean no one has ever died from missing someone. I know that. Sometimes I say to myself, I can live on my own, and then I will just miss him. That’s not that big a deal. Missing someone.. pssh.. bring it on. But then you never really remember how badly you missed him until the next time he’s gone. And in fact, everything I have included in my life for the past nine months has been for him, about him, with him. So when he is gone, my daily tasks become quite meaningless and un-fullfiling. I have found a solution, to get a job. But I haven’t secured one yet. What if I can’t find one? I cannot stay in this house for six months by myself, with nothing to do. I mean no one could. Besides the fact that idleness intensifies the feeling of missing someone by about a bazillion. I often feel purposeless when he’s gone. I have no one to take care of, no one to fuss at, no one to do laundry for or cook for, my house in rediculously clean because there is no one to mess it up. We have become quite the old fogeys in the past nine months. We enjoy our life keeping to ourselves. I know that I can’t live like that when he is gone. So many changes, so many adjustments, as soon as I get used to one thing someone turns on a blender and my life is completely re-arranged. I have the emotional range of I-95 and the United States Navy is dragging me up and down and back again at maximum speed. I honestly just want it to be over with. We keep saying, I wish it were tomorrow, or yesterday because there would be no more anticipation. That’s the worst thing about anything. Like getting a tattoo, the anticipation is worse than the actual pain you will endure. Except on your foot. I do in fact think the pain is worse. But that’s another story.

I have not put the date on my dry-erase callendar. It’s a month behind actually. I refuse to acknowledge it and let it take hold of my life any sooner than it must. A lot of people tell you not to ignore emotions, but we military wives are not a lot of people, are we? Life is so different for us. The very way in which we process emotion and information is completely different. By ignorning it, we can simply enjoy the time we have together instead of dreading the day he leaves. Until of course, I drag out the seabag once again. This time, for the long haul.

2009 BAH rates

Just an FYI that the 2009 BAH rates are out. Take a look to see if yours went up or down. Remember if it goes down, your safe, you still maintain the rate you have.

http://perdiem.hqda.pentagon.mil/perdiem/bah.html

If it goes up then come January 1 enjoy! Of course that extra money will probably be spent on home heating oil or the electric bill. But still, relish the slightly larger pay check.

Perspective

It’s the time of year to look around and be thankful for all that we have.  And by that I don’t just mean the material stuff, in fact, I think this time of year the material stuff should matter less and the “other” stuff more.  A few days before Thanksgiving I had a miscarriage, one of the reasons I haven’t been around here much, and it was such a low point.  Times like that, even despite the holidays, it was easier to focus on the negative.  Until my husband snapped me out of it.

We don’t live in a big McMansion, we don’t have luxury cars, we don’t have lots of extra digits in our bank account, in fact if you keep on the notion of what we don’t have it could be pointed out that we don’t often have a lot of time together.  But we do have each other.  And as cliche as it may sound that’s everything.

Being a part of a military family has given me incredible perspective.  Perspective that I don’t know if I would have if flyboy was working nine to five in an office.  I think we appreciate more of the little things.  Every holiday and birthday spent together is special because, well, you don’t know if you’ll be together for the next one.  So much time is spent apart that the time together is what matters.  Not the dollars in the bank or the size of your house.

NWR New Tonight 10pmCT featuring IA Deployments and Pat Hrabe

Update: 8:23CT – UPDATED Showtime of 10pmCT. We had a scheduling mix up, hope you are still able to listen!

Cross posted from navywiferadio.com

IA Sailor

Tuesday- Dec 9th – Is your spouse currently on an IA? Contact us today at wendy(at)navywiferadio.com and be on the show. We are talking creative communication, everything from care packages to skype. We want to hear the good, bad and the ugly of your IA experience. Plus, we are continuing our Holiday Favorites series and welcome back the creator of the hit web series, “Hey, Shipwreck” Pat Hrabe! Sheree from Beedwork by Sheree stops in to talk about her Deployment bracelets, another one of our favorites! Join the fun!

We invite you to join the conversation!

Show Details:

9 Dec 08 – Tuesday 10pm ET
Yahoo IM: Navy Wife Radio
You don’t want to miss this show LIVE!
Our call in # is 646-652-4629.

To listen live go to: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/navywiferadio or

Show link: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/navywiferadio/2008/12/10/Navy-Wife-Radio

Hey, Shipwreck!

Also on the show:

Deployment Bracelets by Sheree

Deployment Bracelets by Sheree

http://www.beadworkbysheree.com/deployment-bracelets.htm

Sams salutes Military Families

Great news from Sams Club

Military personnel with proper identification can shop and save on their holiday meals and gifts at Sam’s Club without a membership. The company will also waive its 10 percent non-member service fee. The military open houses will be held Monday, Nov. 17, Monday, Dec. 1 and Monday, Dec. 15 in 598 Sam’s Club locations in the U.S., during regular club hours.

www.samsclub.com


Thanksgiving Success!

Well I did it! I cooked a turkey and it was delicious! We had a wonderful first Thanksgiving as Mr&Mrs. Today we ate leftover Thanksgiving and watched Christmas movies on Tv. This is my FAVORITE time of year and I am loving it!